So by now I’ve caused a storm of concern over the fact I didn’t tell my peeps outside of Arizona that Red and I were in trouble. Partly because I didn’t want to worry relatives and friends in a way I thought was unnecessary at the time, partly because I new it wouldn’t last (although 16 days was longer than expected, partly because so many friends in Green Valley were as supportive as they could be.
To those of you I am truly sorry, but I just didn’t know what to say. I really didn’t want to worry you when I knew it would eventually work out. I just didn’t know how long eventually would be.
I was in a constant state of tension and fatigue. It all seemed too hard. My ex and I had been negotiating a modified spousal support agreement after my forced retirement. This had been going o for six weeks and we were at a standoff. Not about the amount, but about what would happen first - a signature on paper or handing over a cashier’s check. I was adamant about having the signed agreement before giving him the money.
His solution to the stalemate was to file an order of protection saying I had slapped him. The police who served the order were very nice and spent 45 minutes with me explaining my options and how to request a hearing. But in the end I had 15 minutes to gather my things and leave.
Several of the people, reacting to my predicament have said that it’s ridiculous that a person can be thrown out of their home based solely on someone else’s word before their side of the story can be heard.
I don’t agree with that view. I think the number of people who are truly in fear of someone in their household is way greater than the few who use an order of protection spitefully. I’m glad that our legal system offers immediate relief to people who are afraid for their persons and the welfare of those they love.
What I didn’t agree with is that he could force my dog to go with me, even though our son who lived with us was willing and able to care for him. It wasn’t like Red would bother my ex. The poor dog slinks away from him.
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